Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
