I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
