he thought i was a dude.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
