the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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