i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
