I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
