If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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