Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
