he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
