Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
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