my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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