Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
