you guys were way drunker than both of me
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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