Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
