The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Can Purell be used as lube?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
