oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
