I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
