We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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