his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
