and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
