Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
