I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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