Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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