Little spoons don't ask big questions
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
why is half of my head shaved?
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