All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
He felt like a one man threesome
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
