one two three fourrrrnication!
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
