very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
