Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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