I wannas sexs uuuuu
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize