But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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