If i come over, it means nothing
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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