do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
