We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
