I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
