Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
