He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize