She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
love makes seman taste better
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
