their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
