Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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