So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
