Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
