Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
