I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
