Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
