he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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