Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
