as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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