some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
