Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
