i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
So drunk its hurt
"it" just moved
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Everyone says I win the strip club
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
