As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
